Rainy days.

Oh how I love days like these.

And oh, how much I desperately need them.

Especially now.

Life’s been pretty crazy lately and this summer has been quite intense in a lot of ways. A little too much at times I’m realizing now, as I’m laying here pretty exhausted with a cold, cuddled up under a cozy blanket.

But it’s okay.

It’s calming down now (soon anyway) and it’s only a matter of time before I will be on a plane, on my way back to California.

I have mixed feelings about that one too, but I know it will be good. I’m really excited for this year.

But yes, today feels like a gift. Not only did the rain mean that I didn’t have to go to work- it’s also the perfect excuse to cuddle up inside, drink tea and do nothing. To just rest. I’m going to spend today trying to remind my mind how to do that.

All that said; a few days ago I found this thing I wrote on my phone earlier this year and fell in love with it.

Hearing the thunder outside this morning felt like the perfect excuse to share it,

So here you go.

I’ll let it speak for itself.

May 20th, 2018

“I know I should sleep
but I’m spending my night
wide awake,
watching the sky shoot fireworks outside my window.

The same thing happens every time
and yet, every time, it’s so different.
I never get tired of it.
The darkness. The stillness. The waiting. The expectancy.
The countdown tying one moment to the next.
The knowing it will come,
Yet not knowing when or how.

And then, just like that, it does.
Lighting up the sky, being almost offensive towards the deep darkness it so abruptly invaded. It drives it away with undeniable force and then leaves, as qiuckly as it came.

If I didn’t know better I would deem it to be just a tease.

Just a bright glimmer of hope flickering before my eyes
long enough for me to become aware of it but even more aware of the fact that it will never be there long enough for me to grab hold of it.

But I do know better.

I know because the light has proved it’s consistency.

It will come.
It’s only a matter of time.

And just in case you ever miss the bright action
the words never fail to follow
and they speak loud.

Loud,
with a roaring thunder.

When you hear it,
really hear it,
you will never again doubt the presence of the light.

Sleep will come when it sees fit
but until then
I won’t rush it.

I’ll just lay
right here
And enjoy the show.”

//Hanna

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